Here’s a “rerun” of a poem of mine which I posted months ago. It seems appropriate as my brain this past week is stuffed with so much CFS/FMS “fluff”, I’m surprised it isn’t coming out my ears. Maybe if it was, I could pull some out and find my brain!
A Hum or Two
by, Kerry Ryan-Kuhn
Pooh Bear has found me
Came knocking at my door,
Under the pretense of craving honey,
But I suspect there is more.
Perhaps he heard that I, too,
Have become of little brain,
And fluff between my ears
Is all that remains.
Between spoonfuls of honey
He offers me a hum or two,
And tells me that hums and poems
“Have to find you.”
And now finding myself
A poet left with little brain,
I wonder if in the fluff
The poetry remains.
For if poems and hums find Pooh–
And Pooh found me,
I might stop pining for my brain,
And let the fluff be.
This little poem came to me after working with my youngest daughter on an English project about AA Milne’s’, The World of Pooh. After I reread the book, I felt a bond with Pooh Bear, who talks of the “fluff between his ears” and being “a bear of little brain.” Through Winnie the Pooh, AA Milne demonstrates (without intending to) the cognitive struggles that often accompany neurological illness.
Unlike most of us humans struggling with cognitive challenges, Pooh accepts himself with humor and never a judgment. He likes who he is; “fluff between the ears” and all. He doesn’t let it stop him from hunting a Hefalump with Piglet, mooching honey off of Rabbit or cheering up Eeyore with a birthday present of a honey pot with a well-intended message misspelled beyond reading.
In the non-fiction world we live in, it isn’t easy being a human with a once reliable brain that is taken under siege by illness or injury. Simple words often can’t be found or the wrong word springs from one’s mouth instead, e.g. “Can you get the plates out of the computer please,” and “don’t forget to turn off the cupboard!”
Thinking, …oh boy what a feat thinking can be…to string sentences into meaning…the mental exertion can be truly exhausting. Memory is effected. What day is it? What month is it? Geez, sometimes even what year is it! Notes to oneself and lists become essential coping mechanisms.
When I hit the cognitive blips that I do countless times each day, I can feel frustrated and embarrassed. Sometimes though, I think of Winnie the Pooh who reminds me to lighten up, and laugh at my silly self.
This is a wonderful poem! And the lesson is important, too. It doesn’t help to stay frustrated and depressed over memory lapses. Just let out a quick “Oh bother” and move on.
BTW, I like to hum scarecrow’s “If I only had a brain….” I hum it because I can’t remember all the words.
I loved this and laughed in sympathy and empathy. Recently, giving a lecture on a difficult subject, I explained to my audience that I was fraudulent. After the laughter stopped, I remembered the word I wanted, frugal. I experience this Miss Malapropness so often that I do not feel the least frustration any more. I am just delighted that I have the ability to speak and, so far, the sense to correct when needed.
I do so enjoy your writing. It is so full of warmth and gentleness. Even when you are frustrated you remain a delight.
I have always been a Winnie the Pooh fan, and you have just given me another reason to love the happy little no-brain 9stuffed with fluff) fellow. I have been feeling like you have lately, and it perked me up and picked me up to read your poem and post. Thank you!
Kerry,
This is an especially tough year for my fibro and it appears to be the same way for many others. The “brain fog” can be intense. The muscle aches are beyond words. I understand exactly what you’re talking about. I really like your poem.
Jeanne
Kerry, I have just found you. On a day when winter has frozen my sense of humor along with my connection with clear thought, I read your Pooh-Connection and it is just right. Thanks. Mokihana a.k.a.sally
that was good. thank you. I love the original Winnie The Pooh writings (not a fan of the disneyfied versions) and it is helpful, in the midst of MCS brain fog, to think of how unashamed Pooh was of being a bear of very little brain!
And you’re right – he didn’t let it stop him from all sorts of adventures.
Thanks for this inspiration (this came on a day of little brain and much frustration for me and is much appreciated!)
Today, I am excited to have found you.
Reading about fluff makes me feel happy and sad at the same time.
After the resection of my brain tumor (invasisive/benign), I now have a whole the size of a grape in my head.
We all want to have special tallents. I want to be able to chew bubble gum, stick it in my ear, and to blow bubbles. I could be the life of a party!
I am trying to find a community to share chronic illness humor with, as I try to make it through everyday life. My e-mail address is survivor_steph@yahoo.com and my blog is at http://chronichumor.blogspot.com/.
Thank you. I don’t write well. I needed to write.